Everyone lies. Especially to themselves. It’s hard to admit this about yourself. But the truth is that YOU are lying to yourself. And you’re doing it all the time.
It might not be intentional. You might be so caught up in your values and beliefs that you actually don’t think you’re lying to yourself. But that’s a huge misconception.
I don’t say this to chastise you. I’m guilty of this myself, just as much as we all are. I actually say this out of great humility and a desire to help shape your future.
Because, here’s the truth. Once you relinquish those lies and give up on those age-old beliefs that hinder you, anything is possible. Truly, the world will become your oyster.
But it’s not easy. Nope. Not one bit. Letting go of these lies are hard. Why? Because, they’ve shaped our identity. Who we are is founded upon the very lies we tell ourselves.
How To Stop Lying To Yourself
Not all lies are bad. Some can actually empower and shape our future for the better. For example, saying I’m a lean, mean fighting machine when you’re overweight is a good lie.
But saying I’m just big boned, and I can never lose weight is a bad thing. Both of these are lies. You’re not either of these things until you really convince yourself that you are. The problem is that so many of our lies are passed on.
Growing up, if your parents always said money doesn’t grow on trees, you likely bought into that lie. And, trust me, it’s a lie. There is so much wealth and abundance in the world that it’s actually dizzying.
So here’s the question. How do you actually stop lying to yourself and set your mind right?
What Is A Lie?
Before you can stop lying to yourself, you have to understand what a lie actually is. To answer that question, think about a lie you’ve told in the past. Of course, there are total fabrications of the truth we tell to others.
When you knowingly lie about events, that’s another story. We’re not talking about that. We’re talking about lying to yourself. Not to others. If you’re constantly lying to others, there’s a deeper issue here.
Now, that’s not to say that certain lies to others can’t actually help you. Documented stories of people telling their friends they won the lottery, actually led to them winning the lottery.
That’s certainly next level, law of attraction, abundance-style thinking. The power of belief can most certainly attract abundance into your life. But it can also create scarcity.
Why You’re Always Lying To Yourself
So here’s the truth. The human mind experiences 60 to 85-thousand thoughts in a given day. Yes. That many. But most of them are repetitive. And most of them are also very negative.
We convince ourselves that we’re not good enough all the time. We lie, bold-faced, right to ourselves. Look, this reality that we’re experiencing is not real. It’s totally fabricated by the mind. It’s a big fat lie.
Our brains turn photons of light into colors, tastes, sounds and so on. I’m not going to get very scientific or metaphysical with you here. But if you want a deeper explanation about the lie of physical reality, read Metahuman – Unleashing Your Infinite Potential by Deepak Chopra and prepare to be blown away.
But understand that you’re always lying to yourself. ALWAYS. Every single moment of every single day, you’re lying. So why not create empowering lies rather than ones that hold you back in life?
Where Do These Lies Come From?
So where do these lies come from? What’s their origin? No, I’m not talking about the lie of physical reality. That’s another discussion entirely. I’m talking about the lies we tell ourselves. Lies like:
- I don’t have enough money to start a business.
- No one likes me
- I’ll never lose weight, so why even try
- Everyone is a backstabber
- All men cheat
- People are always judging me
- I’m too short, so she’ll never like me
- Money doesn’t grow on trees
- If I only had more time, I would…
- People think I’m stupid
- I can’t change because…
- It’s impossible to make money online
Get the point? You don’t even realize how many times you’re lying to yourself. But here’s the thing. Most of the lies you tell yourself are actually born out of failure.
When you fail at something, you experience immense amounts of pain. And, your brain’s inherent job is to help you avoid pain and gain pleasure. That’s why we’d rather not try than give something our all and fail.
But somewhere, long ago, the actual experience of failing at something created a fear of failure that’s far greater than the pain of actually failing. That’s where the lies come from.
You were rejected by a woman (or a man). You went through a divorce or lost a business or had someone steal some money from you. That was a painful situation.
So, your brain threw up barriers and walls that are now holding you back. And therein comes all the lies. The lies are actually designed to protect us from pain. But they do more to limit us than they do to empower us.
How To Create New “Lies” To Empower You
To progress and move forward, you need to relearn how to tell constructive lies to yourself. Not destructive ones. But before you can do that, let’s look at how our beliefs (aka our lies) are formed.
Growing up, often out of an abundance for care and love and protection of our children, our parents emblazon certain beliefs into our minds. These beliefs shape who we are.
The problem is this. Our beliefs place a ceiling on our limitations. Even if the beliefs weren’t actually spoken, they were learned through behavior. What your mother and father did have as much an impact on shaping your beliefs on what they said.
Okay. Most of us get that. But here’s the biggest issue. Beliefs create the operating system of our minds. It’s the underlying code that makes us who we are. This gets stored in our subconscious minds. Not our conscious minds.
Why is this important? Because our conscious minds can only process 40 bits of data per second from our environment. Our subconscious minds can do 40 million bits of data per second. Yep. The subconscious is one million times more powerful.
That’s why mantras and other techniques often can’t stem the tide. Our operating system is too powerful. But that doesn’t mean we can’t rewire our brains for success.
Neurons That Wire Together Fire Together
An old saying in neuroscience goes like this. Neurons that wire together, fire together. Meaning, the more you run a particular lie in your mind, the more it becomes ingrained in you. And the more powerful the operating system of your mind becomes.
Think about it this way. Have you ever had an argument with someone about race, religion or politics? These are highly charged topics that carry deep-seated beliefs. Trying to change someone’s beliefs in these areas is next to impossible.
Why? Because those lies were first formed very early on. They took hold and then got stronger as more evidence backed them up. As soon as you understand this, you can look at all the lies you tell yourself objectively rather than subjectively.
To rewire your brain, here’s what you need to do.
- First, understand that it’s hard. Monumentally difficult, in fact, to change how you see certain things. Lies about money, relationships, self-image, politics, etc. are so deeply ingrained that it’s incredibly hard to change them.
- Second, you’re fighting an uphill battle with the subconscious mind. To really rewire and tell new lies, you need to do it when your conscious mind is turned off. This happens during states of theta brain wave activity (aka sleep).
- Third, to avoid self-sabotage, you need to spend a lot of time and effort filling your subconscious mind with new programming. You can do this by using AirPods when you sleep that feed in new software for your operating system.
Stop Telling Bad Lies & Replace Them With Good Lies
This is hard. I know. You know. We all know. It’s a monumental task. But don’t let anyone’s opinion sway you of the fact that you can create any life you want as long as you replace the bad lies with good lies.
I know. It sounds a bit crazy, right? But there are good lies. Find a subconscious mind-altering program you can use for 3 to 6 months every night when you go to sleep.
This is literally how you hack your brain. Where do you get these? One of my mentors, John Assaraf talks about something called Innercising. It’s literally like exercising your brain.
John Assaraf is one of the most brilliant business people minds I personally know. He is off-the-charts intelligent. And if you want to gain access to any of his programs to rewire your brain, just go to his site (this is not an affiliate link by the way, I genuinely believe this 1000%).
Whether you want to conquer your fears, make more money, lose weight, or anything else, he has subconscious reprogramming audio programs to do it. If you’ve struggled doing anything, it’s because your lies are holding you back.
So why not hack your brain and replace those bad lies with good lies?
It will literally transform your life.